2021-11-17 05:44:50
+++ Social PSA +++ (doubles as kinda pissed vent)
This is about a very specific recent situation/encounter but I've got some things to say some people may benefit from.
I have no idea whether the one who inspired this is reading it, but it does not matter.
If I ever tell anyone off for shitty talking points by telling them they have shitty talking points/using a common term for people with such shitty talking points- that's not an invitation to message me with why you personally cannot even have shitty talking points (like because people have them about you or friends of you).
**1. Disengaging/kicking/banning/blocking and the like are clearly not invitations to have a conversation.
2. You're not entitled to a conversation. With nobody.
3. You're not entitled to an explanation either! If you are made aware that you're exhibiting harmful behavior it's your own responsibility to prevent it (thus, to educate yourself) - just like it'd be my responsibility to stop kicking your leg if you tell me it hurts/is bad.
4. Being part of marginalized group A, B or C or having friends who are doesn't magically make you incapable of exhibiting discriminatory behavior towards these groups. Like, there's women who exhibit sexism against themselves, trans folk who thinks about themselves in transphobic ways - and that's just a few! That all exists. You're not a magic exception.
5. Using the fact you belong to one or more marginalized group(s) and/or have friends in whichever marginalized group to try and justify why you cannot possibly be discriminatory in your behavior is among the most pathetic things I know people to do.
6. You're not the center of the universe. Neither am I. If I end contact after calling you out I probably will forget
7. And a last rather personally targeted one: Me calling out discrimination does not make me a hypocrite if you belong to a marginalized group yourself or have protected marginalized people. Calling me a hypocrite for calling out your discriminatory behavior just means you have not understood what marginalization and structural discrimination means and that you really should read up on it.**
I could explain in detail, but that's not my job. Antidiscriminatory work doesn't mean pre-chewing every bit of information. It's making you aware you're being discriminatory in what you do or say and, if necessary, that one has to educate oneself actively instead of demanding to be fed information about what was done wrong.
Anything else I do, every explanation of ableism, every conversation on mental health, every explanation of saneism, every detail on systemic discrimination I pass on - all these things are
extra. This is all work, you know? Work I do in my free time on top of it.
Oh and yeah.
If you make a discriminatory statement and I point it out there's not going to be an apology from my side. It's not me who screwed up.
And if someone is around who knows you and by reading what I write they notice your discriminatory thoughts/words/actinos then I do not care how that affected your feelings. It's still not me who screwed up. Pointing out/bringing attention to aspects of your thoughts/words/actions - well, they're still yours. You're the source of it. If it's problematic and you're the source then it's not the one who made it obvious who should think about an apology.
And now.
a) I do not want an apology
b) I do not want a message
c) If you still want to try, then read this message from the start.
d) Refer to 6.
Kthx.
338 views02:44
A
