2021-05-16 05:07:24
ot about sex; it is not a license for sex. Marriage is not escapism, nor is it a travel ticket. (If you want to get away, just pack up and drive somewhere.) Marriage is also not a social status of independence. (Don't get married because your peers or siblings or parents tell you.) Marriage is almost the opposite of leaving society -- it is essentially taking on a different role in society. Do not enter into marriage if either of you wants something from the other. This point is tricky, but you can think of it this way: without benefits, are you willing to suffer with this person for the rest of your life? (If they slip into an indefinite coma the moment after you are married, what would you do?) Think carefully and honestly: where would be the breaking point of your love and desire to be around this person? If you can identify that, then you can make preparations to have that point never come.
Everything is history, and all time is investment. Your lifetime is limited; do something worth your time. Be honest in your heart to God and submit to Jesus Christ and he will take care of you more than anyone else could. I was apprehensive about my move from New Jersey to Delaware, and when I was praying in church, an angel came to me and told me, "The Lord takes care of his own," and that is wherever they are.
When I was a graduate teaching assistant in college for my master's degree, I saw that my professor and I were spending a great deal of time after class grading papers. On several occasions, I had the distinct impression that his wife was going to leave him. I did not know what to say to him without causing offense. I guess some people just have to learn things the hard way. Years later, I called him and asked about his family, and he said that he was divorced, that his wife left him and moved on with another man. I told him that I had a sense of that when we were working together and when I met his family at some of the parties they had hosted for the department, and that he probably could have spent less time at work. When I told my mother about this matter, she said that many marriages were broken because of this kind of situation -- a spouse spending too much time on their own work or job. So if you like helping people, then find some work helping people that both of you are happy doing with each other. Just make sure that neither work nor money comes between you two, because money destroys relationships.
When I was working on snow removal last winter in Delaware, my boss would be calling his wife and son over in California every day, even while we were in the car on the way to a job. I asked him why he called his wife every day, and he replied, "If I don't call her every day, then what kind of relationship is that? Then I'm not married."
One time when I was on a shuttle bus while I was studying in Baltimore, I met a young lady who said she made overseas calls to her (boyfriend, I think) for hours every day. Someone had told me that long-distance relationships are difficult. They are also expensive, apparently.
Well, I hope you both can benefit in some way from my good-intentioned yet unsolicited advice. So many people make all sorts of horrible life-altering decisions. It's such a shame, really. Life is too short to waste on brazen folly. I'm sure you are responsible and you and your spouse will break the mold when it comes to delightful marriages! With all the variegated experiences in life, marriages are never really broken despite struggle, but perhaps what I have said will help you become more certain of whether you are both suited to marrying each other.
One final point: I have learned that God and Jesus Christ alone is trustworthy, and he always offers everyone free information, guidance, and comfort. Simply ask. He is the one who invented marriage in the first place.
It was great meeting you. Thanks for your time. Kind regards to you in this apathetic world. Godspeed to you and your loved ones!
Sincerely,
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P.S. Vaccines maim and kill many children every year, and public schools teach many lie
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