Nanofiction

2021-08-19 23:04:50 Eat Your Ice Cream, Bart

“Eat your ice cream, Bart,” said Mom.

“But I want more broc’li!”

“You are what you eat,” Mom reminded him, “and all these vegetables are making you grow up far too fast. I want my little sweetie back!”

Bart grimaced grumpily.

“I’ll put carrot shavings on it,” Mom offered.

“Fine.”

(source) Open / Comment

2021-08-18 18:56:16 Directionless

The farmer waved as the hikers disappeared up the trail towards the highway. “Eighth lost group this summer,” he said.

“Ever get tired of this?” his wife asked.

“Giving folks directions ain’t no trouble.”

“I mean the farm, and never goin’ nowhere.”

The farmer shrugged. “Ain’t nowhere I wanna go.”

(source) Open / Comment

2021-08-17 15:44:21 The Most Memorable Road Trip

“Road trip!”

We’d packed that hatchback so full of clothing, food, and camping gear that we could hardly buckle our seatbelts. We had no plan but “Go”, no destination but “Good times”.

We put the car in gear, and

BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM!!

all four tires burst simultaneously.

“…House party!”

(source) Open / Comment

2021-08-16 21:39:44 Living the Lazy Life

“Papa Panda! Papa Panda!”

There it went again.

“Papa Panda!”

It was incessant, unceasing, never-ending. (Synonyms were one of Papa Panda’s few pleasures.)

Papa Panda rolled over, half-opened one eye, and gestured impatiently at the annoying, agitating throng.

The tourists roared with glee.

Papa Panda found zoo life emotionally taxing.

(source) Open / Comment

2021-08-15 12:00:23 A Metamorphosis

One morning, as he woke in his bed from troubled dreams, Gregor Samsa discovered that he had been transformed into a monstrous cockroach.

Moments later, as World War III began, civilization was destroyed by a nuclear missile. Gregor was lucky to survive.

It’s nice how sometimes things just work out.

(source) Open / Comment

2021-08-14 22:35:19 Writer’s Block

The word eludes me.

“Done yet?” she interrupts.

I scowl. “Looking for another Bestseller?”

“Yep!” my assistant chirps. She loves launch parties.

Sanity vanishes. I strike with my pen repeatedly.

Blood oozes, and she dies at my feet.

“Contract’s expired.”

I blink. “There’s the word I was looking for… Expired.”

(source) Open / Comment

2021-08-13 18:55:29 Through the Flames

I could barely see him through the smoke, a wispy silhouette, dancing and swaying to the rhythmless music of the crackling bonfire. His erratic movements transported me to some other place, a far-off, magical land. He was ethereal, mesmerizing, screaming…

Screaming!?

“DON’T JUST STAND THERE! MY PANTS ARE ON FIRE!!”

(source) Open / Comment

2021-08-12 23:24:44 Hide, Hide, Don’t Dare to Breathe

I crouch, bound in tension, not daring to move, not daring to breathe, not daring to blink, lest I be discovered. The consequences would be extremely unsavoury…

Someone enters the room, stops, inhales deeply. Can they smell me? They depart.

I peek. The coast is clear.

This pie is MINE!

(source) Open / Comment

2021-08-11 13:01:30 Open Door

Here I stand, alone at the front, the crowd murmuring from stolid pews. My coat tails limp, my collar moist with sweat. I imagine her in white, coming up the aisle, my heart pounding.

But when I look, there are only faces full of pity and an empty, open door.

(source) Open / Comment

2021-08-09 21:56:17 Correlation Does Not Imply Causation

When he got his Visa bill, his eyes popped out of his skull.

They literally fell right out. We aren’t sure if something on the bill caused it, or if the two events were unrelated. All we know is that his eyeballs ended up on the floor.

It was gross.

(source) Open / Comment