Ibn Kathīr reported: Abū ʿUthmān al-Wāʿidh may Allah have merc | IlmTest

Ibn Kathīr reported: Abū ʿUthmān al-Wāʿidh may Allah have mercy on him was asked: “Which of your deeds do you most hope for its acceptance (by Allah)?”
وقال ابن كثير رحمه الله: سئل أبو عثمان الواعظ رحمه الله: أي أعمالك أرجى عندك؟

He said: When I grew up while I was in al-Ray and they wanted me to marry but I used to refuse.
فقال: إني لما ترعرعت وأنا بالري وكانوا يريدونني على التزويج فأمتنع،

A woman came to me and said: “O Abū ʿUthmān, I love you so much that I cannot sleep at night and I have no patience. I ask by the controller of the hearts (Allah) and make him mediator that you marry me.”
فجاءتني امرأة فقالت: يا أبا عثمان، قد أحببتك حبًا أذهب نومي وقراري، وأنا أسألك بمقلب القلوب، وأتوسل به إليك لما تزوجتني.

I asked: “Do you have a father?”
فقلت: ألك والد؟

She said: “Yes.”
قالت: نعم

So He was brought and I married her in the presence of witnesses.
فأحضرته، فاستدعى بالشهود فتزوجتها،

But when I went to her alone I saw that she was one-eyed, crippled and disfigured.
فلما خلوت بها إذا هي عوراء، عرجاء، مشوهة الخلق،

I said: “O Allah, praise be to you that you have decreed her for me.
فقلت: اللهم لك الحمد على ما قدرته لي.

My family used to blame me for marrying her but I would always increase my goodness and good behavior with her.
وكان أهل بيتي يلومونني على تزويجي بها، فكنت أزيدها برا وإكراما،

Many times she kept me with her and prevented me from attending some al-majālis (ie: gatherings of knowledge),
وربما احتبستني عندها، ومنعتني من الحضور إلى بعض المجالس،

And due to that I would consider myself as if I was on hot coals but I never showed her anything about my feelings.”
وكأني في بعض أوقاتي على الجمر، وأنا لا أبدي لها من ذلك شيئا،

I remained like that for fifteen years,
فمكثت كذلك خمس عشرة سنة،

(Due to this) there is no good deed which I hope for acceptance because I preserved her love for her (ie: by not showing her how he felt towards her).
فما شيء أرجى عندي من حفظي عليها ما كان في قلبها من جهتي.

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