Human Nature

2022-04-16 08:58:35 Handling Anger

Never respond to an angry person with a fiery comeback, even if he deserves it... Don’t allow his anger to become your anger. Anger is one of the most infectious emotions. When somebody attacks us verbally, for many people the urge to offer a nasty, angry comeback is so overpowering that they do it automatically. Before you know it, you’re engaged in a verbal fight. Working on controlling your anger can provide great benefits when it comes to strengthening your impulse control. Every time somebody attacks you, resist the temptation to engage in a fight by either finding something funny about the situation, deflecting the attack (for example by thanking the attacker for expressing their opinion, which might then strike you as humorous), or if those are not possible, walking away from the situation.

Remember that in the grand scheme of things you gain nothing — and risk a lot — by responding with a fiery comeback. As good as venting feels at that moment, losing your temper is not worth it when you consider the potential longer-term cost, such as losing your job, your reputation, a key relationship, or even just ruining your mood for the entire day. Refusing to respond with anger is a simple exercise, but not easy. And that’s why, combined with the fact that most of us deal with aggressive people at least once a week, it can be a valuable opportunity for you to increase your self-control when interacting with others.

“Very often in everyday life one sees that by losing one’s temper with someone who has already lost his, one does not gain anything but only sets out upon the path of stupidity. He who has enough self-control to stand firm at the moment when the other person is in a temper, wins in the end. It is not he who has spoken a hundred words aloud who has won; it is he who has perhaps spoken only one word" ~ Hazrat Inayat Khan

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2022-04-12 09:55:07 And that is the power of reason: it can reason about itself. When something appears mad, we can look for a method to the madness. When a future self might act irrationally, a present self can outsmart it. When a rational argument slips into fallacy or sophistry, an even more rational argument exposes it. And if you disagree—if you think there is a flaw in this argument—it’s reason that allows you to do so.

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2022-04-11 11:00:36 Mindset Strategy: Master the Art of Office/Organization Politicking

With regards to mindset as you engage in a contest, be calmer than normal and try to see into your opponent’s mind. The enemy whose voice becomes higher in pitch, eyes widen, face reddens, muscles bulge and face grimaces is basically incompetent and will clumsily hit through to the ground. When faced with a second-rate adversary such as this, maintain serenity of mind and observe his face dispassionately so as not to provoke him. Then, taking hold of your sword, smile and assume a position lower than the upper stance. Coolly evade his blow as he tries to attack you. When the enemy appears somewhat bewildered by your unusual attitude, this is the time to strike.

Also, if your opponent is quiet, eyes narrowed, body at ease, and he is holding his sword in a relaxed manner as if his fingers are floating on the hilt, assume that he is an expert. Do not saunter carelessly into his range. You must seize the initiative and assail him skillfully, driving him back and striking in quick succession. If you are nonchalant with such a competent opponent, he will corner you. It is crucial to ascertain how capable your enemy is.

In terms of where you should position yourself, the same conditions apply in both spacious or cramped locations. Step in so that walls will not impede your sword swings from either side. Take an approximate stance with the long sword and nimbly close in on your foe. If your sword should collide with some barrier, the enemy will become emboldened and will hem you in. Keep the light behind you. With your usual training, be prepared to freely apply any kind of technique with a relaxed mind, but always execute with urgency. It is important to adapt according to the circumstances.

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2022-04-09 10:36:33 How we Cope with Pain

Perhaps the greatest faculty our minds possess is the ability to cope with pain. Classic thinking teaches us of the four doors of the mind, which everyone moves through according to their need.

First is the door of sleep. Sleep offers us a retreat from the world and all its pain. Sleep marks passing time, giving us distance from the things that have hurt us. When a person is wounded they will often fall unconscious. Similarly, someone who hears traumatic news will often swoon or faint. This is the mind's way of protecting itself from pain by stepping through the first door.

Second is the door of forgetting. Some wounds are too deep to heal, or too deep to heal quickly. In addition, many memories are simply painful, and there is no healing to be done. The saying 'time heals all wounds' is false. Time heals most wounds. The rest are hidden behind this door.

Third is the door of madness. There are times when the mind is dealt such a blow it hides itself in insanity. While this may not seem beneficial, it is. There are times when reality is nothing but pain, and to escape that pain the mind must leave reality behind.

Last is the door of death. The final resort. Nothing can hurt us after we are dead, or so we have been told.

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2022-04-07 14:18:50 Join the discussion group of this channel via

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2022-04-05 20:59:35 Poem: SONG

You told me you liked my voice,
So I sang you a song everyday to sleep,
But it was sweet because of
The beauty of lies, it keeps.

I sang about my pleasures,
And the memories of the moments we shared,
I made you my priority,
But I guess, you never really cared.

I sang about the promises you made
Which you never gave a second thought,
I doubt if I misjudged you,
To be a person you're not!

I sang about what's bothering me,
And what has ceased all my peace,
But then I realised I was singing
To the calmness of dark night,
As you've already fallen asleep.

Written by: Samanvita Singh

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2022-04-04 16:12:03 Always Have Options: Options are a primary source of power

Here’s an easy way to sabotage yourself: limit your thinking to black or white. It’s either A or B. You either do it or you don’t. Having only two options takes away your power to choose and makes you susceptible to decision avoidance. This, in turn, makes you less likely to introduce important changes in your life.

Rarely, if ever, are there only two options.For example, let’s imagine you’re now working 9 to 5, but you’d like to become an entrepreneur. Black or white thinking makes you believe that you only have two options: keep your job or give notice and start your business. With only two (opposite) directions to choose from, you can’t make it any harder for you to decide.What about continuing your career while building a side business? How about asking your boss if you can work from your home office? What about changing your form of employment to become a contractor instead of an employee? What about finding a job in a startup that is looking for a cofounder with your experience?

Suddenly you have other options, and those options can empower you to introduce a change instead of having to choose between the status quo and making an irresponsible decision.Whenever you catch yourself thinking that you only have two options, think again. Black-or-white thinking is mental laziness. Always find at least one more alternative and give yourself a better chance of making the right decision.

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2022-04-02 15:23:24 Transform Yourself: Develop Empathy

The greatest danger you face is your general assumption that you really understand people and that you can quickly judge and categorize them. Instead, you must begin with the assumption that you are ignorant and that you have natural biases that will make you judge people incorrectly. The people around you present a mask -a front- that suits their purposes. You mistake this mask for reality. Let go of your tendency to make snap judgments. Open your mind to seeing people in a new light. Do not assume that you are similar or that they share your values. Each person you meet is like an undiscovered country, with a very particular psychological chemistry that you will carefully explore. You are more than ready to be surprised by what you uncover. This flexible, open spirit is similar to creative energy—a willingness to consider more possibilities and options. In fact, developing your empathy will also improve your creative powers.

Begin the Transformation

The best place to begin this transformation in your attitude is in your numerous daily conversations. Try reversing your normal impulse to talk and give your opinion, desiring instead to hear the other person’s point of view. You have tremendous curiosity in this direction. Cut off your incessant interior monologue as best you can. Give full attention to the other. What matters here is the quality of your listening, so that in the course of the conversation you can mirror back to the other person things they said, or things that were left unsaid but that you sensed. This will have a tremendous seductive effect. By "seductive" I mean progressive.

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2022-03-01 09:20:09 WITHDRAWAL

Withdrawal and isolation appear in a variety of forms. People who withdraw from society speak little or not at all, do not look other people in the eye, and are inattentive when spoken to. In even the simplest social relations they exhibit a certain coldness that alienates them from other people. Coldness is in their actions and mannerisms, in the way they shake hands, in their tone of voice, in the way they greet or refuse to greet others. With every gesture they seem to be distancing themselves from the rest of the world.

In all these mechanisms of isolation we find an undercurrent of ambition and vanity. These people attempt to raise themselves above others by accentuating the differences between themselves and the rest of society; but the most that they can gain is an imaginary glory. A belligerent hostility is evident in the seemingly harmless attitude of these social exiles.
Isolation may also be a trait of larger groups. Everyone knows entire families whose lives are hermetically sealed against approaches from the outside. Their hostility, their conceit and their belief that they are better and nobler than others, is unmistakable. Isolation may be a trait of classes, religions, races or nations, and it is sometimes an extraordinarily illuminating experience to walk through a strange town and see how, in the very structure of homes and dwellings, whole social strata isolate themselves from others.

There is a deep-rooted tendency in our culture that allows human beings to isolate themselves into nations, creeds and classes. Conflict, expressed in outdated, impotent traditions, is the only result. It further enables some individuals to make use of latent divisions to set one group against another, in order to satisfy their personal vanity. Such a class, or such an individual, considers itself especially distinguished, values its characteristics most highly, and is preoccupied with demonstrating the faults of other people.

Those who work so hard to accentuate the differences between classes or nations do so chiefly to heighten their own personal vanity. If disastrous events ensue, such as world wars and all their consequences, these people will be the last to take the blame for provoking them. Hounded by their own feelings of insecurity, these troublemakers attempt to achieve a sense of superiority and independence at the cost of others. Isolation in their own tiny universe is their sorry fate; it goes without saying that they are not capable of progress or of contributing to the culture of our civilization.

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